OK, so now what do I write about? It is like being back at school,
except that it is your peers that read and pass judgment on your writing.
I suppose what is needed is a quick run-down of what has happened since we arrived here.
For one, time went so fast, the weeks flew by. The first 6 months were spent job-hunting, just as the field my husband worked in stopped taking on - what timing! We never thought of going back, just a case of how do we get over this hurdle, but then if it was too
easy would we really appreciate it? Well, eventually after a couple of false starts, jobs appeared and we are here packing up the rented house and waiting to move into the new house. Well, it is new to us!
The new house, is a typical South of France style stone house, with the red tile roof. Except that in the region that we live, they don't exist, except for this one! Apparently, the owner, who had it built, so liked the style that he fought quite a planning battle to get it built and now it is to become ours. So the new house, is complete with the beautiful garden that it comes with - who'd have believed it and only just over 2 1/2 years here.
When we arrived, we never envisaged being able to approach a bank and finance buying a house, it just wasn't in the plans, as house prices had risen here as well. We are so grateful for this opportunity and I think that it will be a very long time before we come to terms with what we are doing. In a way, it means that we are staying and not going back to the UK, but it confirms it in black and white, not that we had any intention to anyway. As it is, we haven't been back, not even for a long weekend, since we left in 2006. Most things are available in the local shops, or the internet is fantastic and of course family and friends with their thoughtful packages, that certainly our children delight in receiving! You just have to look around, it is the land of fine food and fashion, so there are great markets and clothes shops just like the UK and the even have C&A still!
I suppose, as usual, we don't fit in to any box, we sold and moved here independently, no help from employers, no hand holding, just shear bloody mindedness!!!! So we had a few hiccups on the way, but we are here and surviving and isn't that what life is all about anyway? We have a good time, because we can go out and about in our campervan and see Europe and will now have our own basecamp to come back to.
So who am I ?
In our locality, last evening, a new book group was formed, never been to one before and it was enjoyable, all ex-pats, so no having to read French, not that I would mine, it is quite an insight reading in another language. Apart from one or two exceptions, they were all, or had been career women, with their degrees and fancy titles. They were all lovely, but what did strike me was there lack of, I want to say self-confidence, but I am not sure that that is the description that I am looking for. They all live in the shadows of living where there husbands have to work, I know that feeling, but it is deeper than that, they have to prove that they are worthy almost. I don't know, maybe because I haven't been the wife with my own career, I just find it strange. They all seem to be in a great rush to get back to work and find childcare, but part of the joys of being a Mother is to be there for your children, surely? I know that sometimes money is tight, so jobs are needed, but I didn't get the impression that that was the reason why, more a case of identifying themselves and saying that I'm a ............ not just a mother. Mothers are whom bring up the next generation, so surely, that is the most important job there is, just a shame we're not paid for it, otherwise it would be a different world!
I do work, but only part-time and during the school terms, which is ideal. Once they have grown and gone, which will happen all to fast, there will still be time for me to do what I want. So I'm a housewife and what is wrong with that? I look at my children and I'm so proud of what they are becoming. Also, having always been there to take them to school, collect them and all the bits in between I feel that we have a close bond.
Apart from anything else, how do they find the time? Something has to give, surely? They go to this book club now, yoga club and taking their children to different sports and music and all that these past times entail. Where do they get there energy and find the time? It is beyond me, I would be a nervous wreck, somewhere in the corner! People wonder what I do, but I don't stop, I try and prepare all our own food, baking cakes, keeping the house clean (full-time job here with the damp), washing, ironing (avoid if possible) and all the other things that keep a house going. I know that I'll have even less time when we move, because we will be doing all the decorating, cleaning and making it habitable.
I know, that I can look in the mirror and know who I am and I would like to think that my children can do the same for themselves. It is important - looking in the mirror and liking the person looking back at you and recognising your own faults, strengths and weaknesses. I don't mean beauty, but what is inside, because as they say beauty is fleeting, but who you are stays with you all your life.
Well, that is my rant over for the day, I've things to do, can't be stuck by this screen all day, there are soaps to watch, coffee to drink and my feet to put up!!!! But, in the real world, the dishwasher needs emptying, clothes need sorting and what am I going to feed the little darlings later.........
